7 months in a nutshell....

Wow. I have SO much to say, I don't even know where to start! It's pretty overwhelming. I wish I had made a blog before, that way I could have just kept updating as I went along, but AH WELL, wish smish !! All in divine timing.

Well, I guess I should start at the beginning then huh?

7 months ago, I left my life, my friends, and my family in NYC to go do an apprenticeship program at the Tree of Life Rejuvenation Center. OH wow, did that change my life. More on the Tree later.

Towards the end of my apprenticeship program, I was under a lot of pressure because I didn't know what I was going to do, where I was going to go, etc., etc. My parents were really pressuring me to get a job already, and start making money. I applied for a job at the Tree, and I was SURE that I was going to get it, but then it turned out I wasn't accepted, which really put me in an uncomfortable/ freaking out position. Not for myself, really, I would have been fine one way or another, but I knew that I was " expected to" settle down somewhere already.

Ah, how Universe, and Divine planning works !! My beautiful soul mate- sister Esther asked me if I would love to go to the California Vipassana Center with her, and sit a 10- day course. I immediately accepted! Oh, the irony. It's crippling. She spoke to me about Vipassana in the beginning of our meeting, and I told her, WITH conviction, that she was CRAZY for doing something like that- I would never be able to! Nor would I want to! However, by the end of 2 1/2 months living,working, and studying at the Tree, I was ready. 

I didn't know anything about this "Vipassana" thing except for two details a) Total and complete silence and b) 14- hour a day meditation. Sign-Me-Up ! 

All my life, I’ve basically lived alone. Even when I started going to college, I had an apartment, and lived alone. The only exception was when I moved into my second apartment and started living with a roommate, but still. I've never really had to share a room, a computer, a bathroom, anything at all. Needless to say, when I got to the Tree of Life, I was totally out of my element (which I knew I would be before I got there). Let’s not forget that I was a bonafied city chick, who threw herself into the hot hot dessert land! This was the first time I’d ever experienced community living, and WOW, does community living change a person! Basically, I was very ready for some quiet. 

Uh oh, one problem though, I’m totally broke! I can’t afford a 10- day course on meditation, no way. Oh boy was I in for a surprise, it’s free! There are no charges for the courses - not even to cover the cost of food and accommodation. All expenses are met by donations from people who, having completed at least one 10- day course course and experienced the benefits of Vipassana, wish to give others the opportunity to benefit as well. In other words, Vipassana is totally run by “ Dana”- The Pali word for the practice of generosity and charity. Pali is the original language of the Buddha.

So- What is Vipassana? Great question. Before I get into it, I would encourage you to go on the Official Vipassana website

Dhamma.org

All of your questions will be answered there.

“Vipassana is one of India's most ancient meditation techniques. Long lost to humanity, it was rediscovered by Gotama the Buddha more than 2500 years ago. The word Vipassana means seeing things as they really are. It is the process of self- purification by self-observation. One begins by observing the natural breath to concentrate the mind. With a sharpened awareness one proceeds to observe the changing nature of body and mind and experiences the universal truths of impermanence, suffering and egoless ness. This truth-realization by direct experience is the process of purification. The entire path (Dhamma) is a universal remedy for universal problems and has nothing to do with any organized religion or sectarianism. For this reason, it can be freely practiced by everyone, at any time, in any place, without conflict due to race, community or religion, and will prove equally beneficial to one and all.

What Vipassana is not:

• It is not a rite or ritual based on blind faith.

• It is neither an intellectual nor a philosophical entertainment.

• It is not a rest cure, a holiday, or an opportunity for socializing.

• It is not an escape from the trials and tribulations of everyday life.

What Vipassana is:

• It is a technique that will eradicate suffering.

• It is a method of mental purification, which allows one to face life's tensions and problems in a calm, balanced way.

• It is an art of living that one can use to make positive contributions to society.

Vipassana meditation aims at the highest spiritual goals of total liberation and full enlightenment. Its purpose is never simply to cure physical disease. However, as a by-product of mental purification, many psychosomatic diseases are eradicated. In fact, Vipassana eliminates the three causes of all unhappiness: craving, aversion and ignorance. With continued practice, the meditation releases the tensions developed in everyday life, opening the knots tied by the old habit of reacting in an unbalanced way to pleasant and unpleasant situations.

Although Vipassana was developed as a technique by the Buddha, its practice is not limited to Buddhists. There is absolutely no question of conversion. The technique works on the simple basis that all human beings share the same problems and a technique which can eradicate these problems will have a universal application. People from many religious denominations have experienced the benefits of Vipassana meditation, and have found no conflict with their profession of faith.”

Vipassana has completely and truly changed my life forever. It has taught me to be a more understanding, kind, compassionate, and loving person. I now realize how much misery I and the people around me are in, and here is this technique that screams, “ Here is the cure! Here is the medicine for your mind! Come and practice me for free!”

AGAIN- all of this information and more can be found on the Vipassana website- Dhamma.Org. I could write about Vipassana forever, and I will in future posts, but i'd like to move along now. 

SO- back the my journey;
After graduating from my apprenticeship program and becoming a Spiritual Live Food Instructor, I spent 4 days of minor solitude with Esther in LA. (Thank you Cy!) We did this in order to preserve the space of minimal stimulation that we had become accustomed to after being at the Tree. So, after those four days, we got a ride to the California Vipassana Center (CVC) in North Fork, CA and I sat my first 10- Day Silent Vipassana Meditation course (check out the center here; www.mahavana.dhamma.org)
The course was from October 15th- October 26th, and then I stayed on to serve the next 10- day course after mine. Serving a course is the ultimate form of Dana- giving 10 days of your life in order to accommodate others, ensuring that they are able to meditate in peace and comfort as you did. From November 12th- November 23rd, I sat my second 10- day course. Following that course, I served a 3- day course that took place on November 26th – November 30th. These 3- day courses are quite unique, and are made for old students who are not in a position to take out 10 days of their life, but choose to brush up on their practice. 

When that course was over, I went back to LA (thanks cy!) in order to explore, see friends, fast, but most importantly to take all the teachings from that past month and a half, and integrate them into the “real world”. I stayed for about two weeks, then went back to CVC in order to serve the Satipatthana Sutta, which is a special course only for old students who have sat at least 3 courses, and been practicing for at least one year. 

I had planned to serve that whole course, but I SOMEHOW got accepted to sit a course that is impossible to get into- The Christmas course in Occidental. I left CVC on December 19tth with my beautiful friend and fellow meditator 

<----Jenna, and we stayed the night in Fresno (Thanks Oahn, Dam, Samson!). The next day, someone came to pick us up and take us to Occidental.  Ah, the amazing works of rideshare and Dhamma! Dhamma and the Universe paved every single pathway for me to sit that course! It was totally amazing and I felt sooo grateful. 

December 20th- Dec 31st, I sat my third 10- day course. Yes, you counted right, that’s 3 courses within a 2 ½ month period, I know, I’m crazy! I came, I stayed, and I never left! Haha. Normally, people sit one course, once a year. 

That 3rd course was the hardest thing I’ve ever worked on in my whole life. I woke up at 4am and was in the meditation hall 7 out of 10 days. I was in complete isolation from beginning to end, and dove deep within myself. I wasn’t even aware that such depth existed , or that I had the ability to ascend to such a level. The funny part is, I know i've only just scratched the surface. Un- expectedly, that was also the easiest meditation to come out of. Usually I am super nervous and it’s extremely overwhelming and difficult, but this time it was really rather fluid. Apparently, transitioning becomes easier the more courses you sit. Good to know. 

OK so, getting closer to the present now.

On December 31st, a bunch of Dhamma Lovers (this is how I refer to the “family” of meditators that I have become very close with) and I went to stay at a co-op in Berkeley called Lothlorien. One of the meditators in this group went to UC Berkeley, and stayed there his senior year. 

This was the first time I had come out of a meditation and went straight out into the “real world”; in the past I had stayed at CVC afterward to serve the course preceding mine. Um, let me just say, it was intense. Really, really intense. Especially because there were lots of people, lots of drama, and I was basically a big, sore, open- wound. Luckily, I reaped a lot of benefits from my Vipassana journey, and really dealt with everything pretty well. Loth is a clothing optional co-op, and being the extremely insecure and self- conscious person that I am, I told my friends there is no way I am getting naked in front of people.

UH, WRONG! Staying at Loth broke down so many walls for me. I took a lot of risks and broke all of my envelopes. One of the main things I learned is; there is nothing weird or sexual about the naked body, it’s just natural! I also learned how to talk about a lot of things that were coming up for me with certain friends- I learned how to communicate openly with objectivity. 

After spending 2 weeks at Loth, I sat a one- day Vipassana course in San Francisco with one of my friends, and then after that, we moved into his parents’ house, also in Berkeley. This was a very great experience in some ways, and in other ways extremely traumatizing.

After staying there for a little under a month, the sh*t hit the fan, and I had to get out of there. My great friend from San Francisco (who I met at my 3rd course in Occidental!) saved me, and invited me to stay with her for as long as I needed. San Francisco was beautiful and I had a great time there, I have a feeling I’ll be back very soon. 

On Feb 12th I went to LA (thanks again Cy!haha) to pick up my stuff and then shortly after, flew back here- Back east to NYC!

WHEW- now, we are more or less caught up to the present. I will love to post more about how I am transitioning and on what I have learned, but right now I must go meditate! I’m still not accustomed to East Coast time, so it’s 1:07am and I’m only now heading to bed. NOT GOOD NOT GOOD!

Anyways- I love you all! If you have any questions or comments, question or comment away.